SATURDAY MORNING I GOT UP EARLY, DRESSED QUIETLY, MADE MY LUNCH, GRABBED MY CLUBS, SLIPPED QUIETLY INTO THE GARAGE AND PROCEEDED TO BACK OUT INTO A TORRENTIAL DOWNPOUR.

THE WIND WAS BLOWING 50 MPH. I PULLED BACK INTO THE GARAGE, TURNED ON THE RADIO, AND DISCOVERED THAT THE WEATHER WOULD BE BAD THROUGHOUT THE DAY. I WENT BACK INTO THE HOUSE, QUIETLY UNDRESSED, AND SLIPPED BACK INTO BED. THERE I CUDDLED UP TO MY WIFE’S BACK, NOW WITH A DIFFERENT ANTICIPATION, AND WHISPERED, ‘THE WEATHER OUT THERE IS TERRIBLE.

MY LOVING WIFE OF 34 YEARS REPLIED, ‘CAN YOU BELIEVE MY STUPID HUSBAND IS OUT GOLFING IN THAT CRAP?

I STILL DON’T KNOW TO THIS DAY IF SHE WAS JOKING, BUT I HAVE STOPPED GOLFING.